Me

I don't know about putting a chapter her about myself, but in case I decide to, here's the spot. A place to keep things people don't know about me but may find remotely interesting. Or not. But it's going here.

Growing up with little parental guidance to speak of afforded me an independence to explore the world that few have. I also was fairly well funded, which helped with the adventures. I've always been curious so although that method of life - trial and error - isn't what I'd recommend to my enemies, it's taught me some resolute truths and things people wouldn't know otherwise. A big part of this writing is to relay those lessons to my daughter without her having to repeat any of them. I've done the leg work and then some in some cases.

Judgemental is what some people~ may ~call me. That's fine; I can also judge them as they do me and tell you some things about them they may be surprised I recognize. When you study people, sociology, psychology, logic, human behavior, and are simply an observant, judgmental person, it happens. I've alsways been observant, and Cecelia my daughter inherited that as well. Her attention to detail is impressive, and little gets past her. It's something that makes me proud and worried at the same time. Being super-observant is both a blessing a a curse. Same with being able to remember minutia from decades past. Trivia, that is of absolutely no consequence, can be recalled all day and night. But ask me to remember something important from last week, and I won't know what you're talking about.

Moving to Louisville has meant giving up professional and life goals. I had my MBA in hand and was ready to use it. Instead I live in a basement and take care of a 1 year old and cook and clean, pull weeds, and repair things. Not what I had in mind back in prep school. It makes you look at life differently. Forces you to, in fact. I take pride in any job I do, whether it's changing a diaper or writing a marketing plan. They're both important jobs that need to be done. And a big part of being a man is doing what needs to be done, especially when no one else will.

I'm also now living in a place that doesn't feel like home and probably won't, since I'm counting the time until we can move and don't plan on staying here. Never have. Casey's a professor and will retire young, which is the current large finish line. We'd both like to move to the coast, and Casey wants it hot. Charleston would be great, but I'm not sure what our financials will be like at that point, and Charleston is much more expensive than Louisville. And certainly much more than over in Indiana. Much.

The names around Louisville are unfamiliar, and I haven't had the desire to get out and try and make friends. As we age, making new friends gets exponentially harder. When you're someone who often feels like a misfit like me finding people that click with you is even more difficult. In SC I had no problem making lots of awesome friends and a thriving upper-crust social life. Here, I know no one and do nothing. I met some nice guys when Megan was at Collegiate, but those days are over. The true story with that: She couldn't hack it. Casey will tell people it was too expensive, including Megan, but Megan was making average grades, not participating in anything to speak of, not and not excelling socially or really in anything, so technically, it was a bad value for our money. She wasn't private school material. And that's OK. Casey also didn't liek that she was so young, from having Megan so young. Combine the age difference with the socio-economic differences between Casey and the other women and Casey hated the place. Casey's view of the world and mine diverge when it comes to socio-economic stances. Her indifference to wealth is one of the things that attracted me to her. But with that comes an unappreciation for anything nice and/or expensive. There's no difference between the nicest and crummiest to her for most things. You just acquire things, use them until they break or are lost, and then get another. That makes no sense to me.

Living here in Louisville, I feel like I have no home. I also said goodbye to my long-term friends, nearly all who are in SC, and Chas especially. I'm told I could keep up with them if I wanted, but keeping up with hundreds of people long-distance isn't really desirable or possible. I also wanted Cecelia to be born in the South. Technically she just made it. The Mason-Dixon line borders Louisville. But the deep South that I knew growing up won't be something she's familiar with, which is a shame. The dripping moss from oak-canopied roads and dolphins coming up to the boat in Charleston and going to the beach on a whim, and eating oysters, and BBQs and storms coming in off the Atlantic and college football. It's something I know well - the southern outdoors- and would love to show her growing up. Louisville is different all the way around - flora, fauna, people, last names, topography, weather, and even when the Sun comes up and sets is crazy. And it's al lbasketball, cigars, bourbon and hyper-marketed Churchill Downs. And Louisville Slugger baseball bats, owned by a company not in Louisville.

There are no animals in Louisville or this area like the South. No squirrels, frogs, turtles, snakes, raccoons, or the rest of the critters that run rampant in SC. Here you see Canadian geese, deer and I once saw a black snake in the road which I promptly caught. Bizarre.